< Muse.Zings >

Sunday, August 31, 2003

Teachers' Dae Dinner *hic*

hopes abt dinner @ sentosa plummets as venue was changed to regent hotel...
the final bomb dropped when all is revealed....our grand spanking sch hall!?!
tok abt high hopes being smashed man!

Check out those parent volunteers man!aint they all decked out!!!*blush* hate to remind them we r in the SCH HALL....not some 5-star hotel...duh
well..urs truly came in a well-covered light grey long dress...hahaha so decent!*score points*
till i saw some parents wearing tubes and i was like..GOSH...hahhaa

as if it wasnt bad enuff...there were performers fr china...dances were nt bad....'cept for dis supposed comedy which i didnt understd nor tried v hard to....hhahaa

karaoke session was still bearable...w some gd songs sung by a few ppl....no barfing,..thank God!
ate quite a bit during the first few rounds...so didnt hav to grin and bear w eating and loud entertainmt @ the same time...

it helped i was seated w the p3 tecahers...namely ramesh, shirley (she's a mummy!), mrs loong, rachel (another mum-to-be), sheryl, wendy, victor, wei peck (who was forcibly whisked away to the vegetarian table but was rescued later by urs truly =) ) and ms tan.

had a lot of fun and laughter...out table won 4 prizes too..me included.,..
okie..wasnt realli a cool prize...25 bucks NTUC fairprice vouncher...better den nothing!mom..dis is urs!
coem to tink of it..i haven realli won anything b4 in such lucky draws and stuff....hmm...
realised i cant run away fr the chang-e thing!!!!!*GROAN* gosh...i realli tink its dumb to hav 7 ppl dressing up as some dumb-ass fairies or dunno wat lady inthe moon to distribute mooncakes...
sigh..come on...its beyond a shadow of a doubt i wld be roped in...juz count hw many unmarried and young (sort of) gals in the sch dat can be saboed! i m definitely on the prority list!sigh...

did i mention i was too tan for dat role?hey fairies aint get no sun yeah?for heaven's sake..she lives on the MOON!!
is anyone listening to ME?! i m seriously perturbed (where did i hear dis word b4?)

gosh...dis is getting to me....i'm on raw nerves dis few days...

things comin up next week...
1) Holiday on monday!!!yayyayayayay....gonna exercise =) .....was so packed dis week..gosh!
2) observation by my supe on thurs...Health Ed?! nm..its only one period...God u gotta be there!
3) lantern nite on sat....toes r crossed too...
4) SUNDAY.....Sibu here i come!!!

2 stacks of compos rotting on my bed...*burp* anyone?

You represent... kindness.
You represent... kindness.
You're a very gentle, kind, and caring individual.
You truely care about people and are generally
well-liked. Though sometimes you may be
perceived as weak, you truely have a strong
heart and a good desire to help others.


What feeling do you represent?
brought to you by Quizilla

Elise @ 2:31 PM | comment link here

okie i promise..dis is the last for the nite...

I see the world in Pink
Pink:
You see the world in bright pink. The world is a
happy, happy place! You love all people and
things!! Life is great! You're just like a
happy child. Spread the cheer.

Made by
Sara



What color do you see the world in?
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Elise @ 1:02 AM | comment link here

Help! I cant stop!!

Hero
You're A Hero!
You live to save the world! You are honest, true,
and always victorious! You may not always get
the girls/boys, but all you really want to do
is battle the bad guys.


What Type Of Anime Character Are You?
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You are DORY!
What Finding Nemo Character are You?

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Jasmine
You are Jasmine from Aladdin!


What Disney Princess are you?
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casablanca
"You must remember this, a kiss is still a
kiss". Your romance is Casablanca. A
classic story of love in trying times, chock
full of both cynicism and hope. You obviously
believe in true love, but you're also
constantly aware of practicality and societal
expectations. That's not always fun, but at
least it's realistic. Try not to let the Nazis
get you down too much.


What Romance Movie Best Represents Your Love Life?
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Elise @ 12:47 AM | comment link here

Hey...received a Jay chou poster in the mail...fr daries!!
Cool!!=)

kiss my ass2
congratulations. you are the kiss my ass happy
bunny. You don't care about anyone or anything.
You must be so proud


which happy bunny are you?
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tomboy
Tomboy


What's your sexual appeal?
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Elise @ 12:03 AM | comment link here

Saturday, August 30, 2003

Gosh i mus be realli bored =)

You are Psalms
You are Psalms.


Which book of the Bible are you?
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You're Perfect ^^
-Perfect- You're the perfect girlfriend. Which
means you're rare or that you cheated :P You're
the kind of chick that can hang out with your
boyfriend's friends and be silly. You don't
care about presents or about going to fancy
places. Hell, just hang out. You're just happy
being around your boyfriend.


What Kind of Girlfriend Are You?
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Gay Bear
Gay Bear


Which Dysfunctional Care Bear Are You?
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hmm i m not dat bad!hahha
asshole
your asshole.


What swear word are you?
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CWINDOWSDesktopBringiton.jpg
Bring It On!


What movie Do you Belong in?(many different outcomes!)
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Elise @ 11:37 PM | comment link here

How true?gosh i hav no idea...

HASH(0x8462510)
Seer


The ULTIMATE personality test
brought to you by Quizilla

entrancing
You have an entrancing kiss~ the kind that leaves
your partner bedazzled and maybe even feeling
he/she is dreaming. Quite effective; the kiss
that never lessens and always blows your
partner away like the first time.


What kind of kiss are you?
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Sweet Dreams
"Sweet Dreams" (by Eurythmics)
Sweet dreams are made of this
Who am I to disagree?
Travel the world and the seven seas
Everybody's looking for something
Some of them want to use you
Some of them want to get used by you
Some of them want to abuse you
Some of them want to be abused


Which 80's Song Fits You?
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Elise @ 5:39 PM | comment link here

I feel so loved *sobsob*

Pressies and cards were all over my table first thing on fri morn..sigh....i was touched indeed =)
Beyond the gifts, i felt the kiddos' innocence and sweetness....gosh i felt so loved!
Mebbe there's onli one day in the whole year u feel like dis...but i definitely gonna treasure dis..

grandma sick again...dis time its the tear duct in her eyes which is swollen and infected...now she looks diff coz of the liquid inside..
gotta go for an op once her infection subsides...mum said its kinda major..considering her age and the eye area....
claiming her healing in Jesus' name!
heartache whenever i look at her....=P

went MK restaurant for tom yum seafood juz to reward myself for being a teacher...hahah
wooo...tom yum soup.....sashimi buffet (SALMON!!!!)...free flow of food.....
u can bet ur last dollar i had eaten the full value of wat i paid for...after swiping the raw salmon and 3 oysters....
whee!!

Word of Big Guy to claim:
"But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well."

processing how to seek His kingdom and wat r the things dat wil be added unto me...heart has drifted away a lil'..

Elise @ 5:19 PM | comment link here

Friday, August 29, 2003


Is the glass half full or half empty?



Which [Rainbow Colours] are you?


hmm...quiz mad mood...hahaha
hey...violet...dats the colour of my site!!=)

Elise @ 12:11 AM | comment link here

Thursday, August 28, 2003

Life passes by

Been an amazing day...battling work in sch....
i muz say the highlight of the day was when i met Shank *gasp* @ bukit merah interchange on my way to cell....
i tot it wld be pretty awkward but strangely i was realli glad to see him...
we kinda passed each other...me on the escalator moving upwards and he walking down the stairs..

the next weirder thing is when i m usu on my headphones...trust me...u can yell, scream and shout..and dis gal will b totalli oblivious dat u r trying to catch her attention..

well...obviously he did...and we talked...
had a gd few minutes of catching up....he juz quitted his job @ philips....on the look out for another....
attending interviews and the works...
yup...still passionate abt rugby....playing for the club and yup...his knee is kinda in a bad shape...

juz dat few minutes he remained the same person as i knew him to be....funny....straightforth...sincere...
mentioned he met abel...haha...tok abt manuel...our BFG....

3 yrs now i guess...
and strangely we were almost back to those times we used to tok and joke...juz now now we r a lil' older...grown up....and of coz not as close as we were b4...

hope we will catch up again...but bets r dat i wun sms him...haha
he prob hav to if he realli wans to...=P

realli wonder wat the BIg Guy is thinking....the fact dat i dun feel awkward mtg him goes to show dat part of my life has been healed...=)
pondering how coincidences r His way of showing us smthing....


Do you need a boy/girl friend now?

Elise @ 11:58 PM | comment link here

Time Out @ School

Playing jay songs in the office...
try beating dat! haha

ok..juz for self amusement....im bored...
struggling thru second marking of compo stack 1....stack 2 lurking in the background...
sci papers piling too...

i need air!

Elise @ 4:50 PM | comment link here

Saturday, August 23, 2003

=P

okie...so the poem isnt cool...so?!
hahaha...its still NOT crappy poetry k??*sulk sulk*

i m way above dat...i m self assured...i m cool..

*bleh*

this page will look temp like dis..with the board at the bottom..IT-bal-wannabe-but-cant-seem-to-make-it me taking sm time to figure things out...

Elise @ 12:56 PM | comment link here

Thursday, August 21, 2003

Blasted Dae

Today's the day...when things went wrong
Dunno wat to say....feeling like a tiring song

Two boys fought...one broke his specs
Parents called.....Lots of troubles to pack

Another got sick....
Fever was his nick
Went back home alone
Almost got me in a huge baloneh!

Managing my bunch...
There goes my lunch
A hungry woman
is an angry woman!

WITS meeting followed...
Three and a half tiring hours swallowed
EVeryone left early, I should have known
Had to take a cab there on my own

DRagged my feet back to school
Lots of marking to do...

Wat else can i say,
On dis blasted dae?

Help me oh Lord,
I need u dear God!

Elise @ 12:11 AM | comment link here

Monday, August 18, 2003

Random tots...

Tot of posting b4 i hit the sack...

Been a mad rush to mark and return stuff to the kiddos...feelin v much like a mechanical robot...
Meanwhile deciphering the meaning of dis song.....tink its called "ni ting de dao"...yup "u can heard" or smthing...

Tinking it was v sweet of elison to sms if i was okie on sunday...when we met rh
yup...tink God has His plans for us...juz diff paths..diff destinies...

Been eating too much...at erratic times..gosh...lunch @ 330 today...miserable scraps after the afternn session's recess...still gobbled it dwn...
plus soya bean milk...my newest way to feel i m drinking smthing healthy,..one dat helps me to hopefulli grow out of my verticalli challenged state (mebbe?)...heck..i m happy being short...

Air may not be fresher...but the butt view is fine by me...

Elise @ 11:41 PM | comment link here

Sunday, August 17, 2003

When God seems Distant........Romans 8:28 - 39

Rarely does the sermon message strike something within my heart and cause my eyes to tear...dis is it.

What happens when u wake up one morning and u dun seem to sense God??Not after sharing everything w Him..putting every thought and secret things through HIm....trying to see if there's anything u had done to cause dis apparent 'unfeeling' for His presence.

Den wat happens if dat was wat Big Guy intended?Not a work of ur flesh or the Evil one?How wld u respond den?

Been trying to piece together wat's been happening all these while beginning last year during encounter till now...the break-up...the time when mum got sick....time when i was realli weak physically...my toughest time at practicum w so many misunderstandings b/w my supe and scm...time when shir and eugin walked away fr my life at the same time...my 2 dearest frens fr ministry...
Relationship, family, health, career, friendship.....

Den the analogy came from the story of the mother eagle and her eaglet...

A time began when an eaglet was born and the mother tirelessly fed it the best worms it cld give and the softest feather dat she has....wat a blissful time of love and favour for the new-born!
Then comes a time when the young one matures but is still indulging in the good times of being comfortable in its nest..soft feathers to cuddle against...juicy worms to fill the tummy...
A time came when tHe mother eagle begins to pluck out the soft feathers......hmm things started to get prickly for the unknowing eaglet...
"Ouch!what is happening?"the eaglet questioned innocently.
The mother didnt stop...more soft feathers were taken...it soon became unbearable for the eaglet.
She didnt stop there....
One day she pushed the little eaglet to the edge of the nest. Now the eaglet was getting panicky...
"This cant be happening!"exclaimed the little one.
With a shove, she pushed him off the edge. there the eaglet went..tumbling down from the tall nest which it knew as its only comfort and security.
Jus before it hit the rock-bottom, the mother eagle came swooping down and captured teh shivering eaglet in her wings and placed it back into the nest.
It happened not once...for this was to be repeated time and again...

Till one day, the eaglet discovered as it was whizzing down in the air...the two tiny flaps on its shoulders...
It fluttered...flipped....and wat do u knoe? The flaps branched out and became its wings.
The wind came and it caught the draught and started to......SOAR.

The mother knew it all along....the little eaglet didnt...wat it means to be soar on eagle's wings.

What can we do when He seems so distant?
1. Tell Him how u feel - honest deep down feelings...of anger..bitterness...He is not petty and His heart is bigger den dat.
2. Know His character - He is the one who gave His son for u....He alone paid teh price...
3. Know His promises - that He will NEVER leave nor forsake u....
4. Remember wat He did for u in the past - lest we forget His goodness and not remember how to give thanks for carrying us all the way....

nadir....a dot at the lowest point....is learning how to soar to the peak.

Elise @ 6:19 PM | comment link here

Saturday, August 16, 2003

Hanging By A Moment

Another week whizzes pass....this can go on and on....
Zipped thru sch...loads of marking...much more....juz imagine...76 pieces of compos...GOSH!hahahaa
Hitting sch tom to clear the load...den make my way down suntec for the harvest event...

woo...they showing flashdance on ch 5...COOl!

was chatting to kiew abt the gay issue on our way back....interesting how God made us in a certain way and the way the world "liberlises" wat they tink is rite and den tries to change others' point of view..

Mich trying to send me pics of her bruises now...hahahhaa...poor babe...Big Guy u better watch over my darling...=)
The other darl ms A *aka A for auntie* seemed quite stressed w her work....dear dear...

Elise @ 12:02 AM | comment link here

Thursday, August 14, 2003

Mission EXTERMINATOR @ NIE

Target 1: BAstard N**
Choice of Attack: Extensive onslaught of pork chops..aka BARBIE at chosen target

Target 2:Bitch J***e
Choice of Attack: Two-way prong of attack via front and back....i mean top and bottom...Snip auntie-like maggi hair into shreds before reducing hair to cinders...bottom: get anal....(juz use imagination.....)

Gosh i feel so good juz thinking abt it....*GRIN* (mebbe dats how dat wacko NUS murderer felt...wooo)

Medical Screening Results

Ms A has succeessful injected her auntieness into dis little dot.....sigh...signed up for (read) FREE medical screening @ sch today...

Here r the results*sigh*
1. Height & weight machine suspiciously faulty.....i m declared shorter and heavier den wat is real...wat is dis world comin to??
2. Ok...it's official...i m UNDERWEIGHT....wat can i say?? den wat the heck is dat ring of fat hanging ard my non-existent waist??
3. I m a dead fish....dead....dead......low blood pressure?! u mite as well say i m cold-blooded!! k...small heart...short body.....not enough blood.....see...the system is underworked...=) how abt dat?

at least i walked away feelin better abt myself as i had juz signed a 6 bucks monthly donation thingy to some kiddo who r sick....(they r realli v poor things)

There is a lot of love in dis world...there is some in my heart!!!HEE =)

Onsludge of marking left me w MAJOR headache...so i rehydrated but ended up getting bloated and head still thumping away...DEAD FISH...*burp*
In the end had to wait for J to come so can pass him the money....feel bad cant help him w muchmore..esp now mum needs cash on the side for her medical stuff on and off...plus that Sibu holiday plans....

SUN SAND SEA...here i come!!

Elise @ 9:55 PM | comment link here

Wednesday, August 13, 2003

Hinds' Feet on High Places

Yup...dats the book i m currently reading...fr audz babe.....not counting Stupid White Men...haha gotta let dat hang on for a while..

Still feelin pretty tired every day...but still loving my job...=)

Woo...Mars got my signal...woo hoo...i muz say it was a gd job on the translation...=)

Elise @ 11:24 PM | comment link here

Tuesday, August 12, 2003

Gruntings...*snort*

Very touched when i read mich's blog...yeah..dat someone is me....w the flat life..
Tink sometimes humans r indeed the weirdest creatures on earth...when everything's smooth-sailing *sorta* intheir lives, they complain they have 'no life'....
when bad things or tribulations come, they moan and groan abt the harshness of life...and hopelessness...
Well..dats me...a normal living weird human being =) homo sapiens of the world unite!

Yeah...doing a quiet reflection after reading mich's tots and the input fr audz today...
Counting my blessings fr my Big Guy...sorrie Daddy dearest somehow i hav let other things come in the way and not see u for who u realli r and wat u have in store for me..

Blessings....already blessed and counting:
1. Living, breathing and still eating.....dats me!
2. My wonderful sometimes being neglected family....gosh i love them so!Farnie bro...studious sis....naggy and neurotic dad....go-to-great-lengths-to-feed-me mum...ever-loving granny...MUACKS!
3. My buds and babes!!!always there to lean on...grouse to...spat at...well...almost lah
4. My kiddos....36 of them...each a special package fr my Guy to me!
5. My job cum ministry....without it we eat grass....LITERALLy!
6. Sch being so near...it only takes me 5 min travel time...3 bus stops...60 cents per trip
7. SMELLY....still w me...still ever flavourful!
8. My ever-increasing pimples...goes to show i get younger every day..
9. This world exists w Jay chou!!!*drool*..yeah yeah..yo yo...
10. My Big Guy has me in His heart....and Him in mine..*HUGZ*

There's defnitely more...not bad for a brain-dead fella to come up w 10 today...

KB is darn tiring..esp w the instructress shouting at u...yes..she SHOUTS....screams...call that encouragemnet manz..
well..kinda worked...coa i imagined punching her face
went amok @ bugis village...bought new nice *cheap* trendy bag for my nuah bro...he liked it =) yeah!
Grabbed cutie lanterns....hoping to give each kiddo one to hang in class den take back...whee...
Managed to get gifts for my mortal too..shld last for these two weeks..hope she;s blessed after receiving them

Oh...pressure to put dis in..
JOKE Corner: Why is MUJI not a fashionable sounding name?
ANS: COz it;s called MU-JI (in chinese)

yeah...laff...watver..i didnt get it at all....guess who;s the joke mistress??

Shopping w audz for her shoes can be gruelling...hahaha...watching her pick every other shoe dat i wld have glossed thru or be too embarrassed to pick up...haha ok its not DAT bad...close enuff tho'
sad she didnt get any...hope her well-worn ones last her till her next find

Shopping sustaenance meter: Low...ask me to look anymore at dingy danglys i sure faint =P and the people...fwah...WHERE DO THEY ALL COME FR MANZ?

k..sandman callin me...chaoz!

PS: Mich....btw....ur lyrics r in CHINESE!!worse den my hanyu pinyi?! i need ENGLISH,....yeah?E*arth calling M*ars...roger dat?over over..

Elise @ 10:04 PM | comment link here

Sunday, August 10, 2003

TA-DA....My Kiddos!!

Took me a while to upload dis pics...sigh...had some trouble halfway....
Looking at their pics makes me smile...*fr ear to ear*....Thank you Big Guy for blessing me with them...
Each of them r so unique...and special...
Yeah...plenty of special kids in my class...autism, mentally-challenged, single..they r my angels...

Recently found dat when i m toking abt my kids, it never ceases to bring a smile to my face..mebbe they r the most meaningful part of my life rite now..
Recalling the conversation i had w cyn on the cab:
"Anything new in your life?"
To which i replied,"No..wat else is new?"
Sad and pathetic aint it? I tink so....seems like God hasnt done anything miraculous in my life recently...
If my life was to be depicted as a graph...it'll definitley be horizontal..

Need to return to the Big Guy...seems like i hav drifted so far away fr Him....
Somehow the word came back:
"The Lord is my Sheperd, I shall not be in want.
He makes me lie down on green pastures, He leads me besides quiet waters,
He restores my soul."

Such simple words...yet they mean so much...in any and everything..i do not need to lack in any..coz He's gonna supply all and be all...
The guitar's collecting dust in the corner of my rm..mebbe its time to let the music play...

Read my bro's blog...fwah..didnt know all that ku ku ness is in his brains..he is sure damn funniEE!!
Gosh..got the same personality as him...now dats not cool!

Elise @ 1:36 AM | comment link here

Saturday, August 09, 2003

Second post of the dae...

feelin terribly lousy....dunno y..PMS??geez...

feel like getting outta here...yet feelin a wee bit tired...sigh...

Elise @ 11:19 AM | comment link here

Sleeping Beauty

Hit the sack @ 4plus in the afternoon yez till dis morn 9am!! Gosh...never slept this much...i feel like a pig. =P
And all becoz of dis little white pill...becane....at least now the runny nose is gone...=) yay!

Never knew i was so tired...mebeb been missing a lot on my sleep...sigh...the work i brought back is STILL lying beside my bed....*dread*

Juz felt good being a Singaporean...singing those nationalistic songs..hahah..yeah...
well...HAppy National DAe!!!

Elise @ 10:02 AM | comment link here

Thursday, August 07, 2003

Frustrated

Dunno y either blogger has gone bonkers or it's me....kept trying to republish the new template...but it states publish error...sigh....

Elise @ 10:43 PM | comment link here

Tuesday, August 05, 2003

Step step....mambo left....

Current playlist...my only cheena idol: Jay the man!!!Wooooooo..*drool*

Still figuring wat he's singing abt.....but i was captivated by mtv...hahhaa...yeah *blush* i bought his newest album and it comes w a vcd stuff....wheeeee....*dancing*

Procrastinating....dun feel like marking those compos lying on my bed...sigh....

oh yeah...haha Thank God i made it back home safely....
Audz was driving me hm....w jay singing in the backgrd...and we survived the trip!!!=)
hahaha...dat song playing in the car thing cost me 20 000 SFs (Special Favours..tho' i prefer it to be known as S*xual Favours..ahahhaha) k...gosh...audz realli knoe how to calculate...

Elise @ 9:48 PM | comment link here

Monday, August 04, 2003

Monday Blues...

Super bad and long dae today...which left me brain-drained and concussed when i finalli managed to warm up my chair in the ofc...gosh......

Brain activity:.................................

Nm...after today...i look forward to better days ahead!!!!=)

SPG Adventures
Went out last week w German pal Manuel....cool that he cld visit again after..wat...3 years?!
Was practically stared @ by ah mohs and non-ah-mohs!!!not dat i was devastating pretty dat day...hahhaha

A day in the shoes of an SPG....oops i mean sandals...watever!?

Elise @ 9:21 PM | comment link here

Sunday, August 03, 2003

Mebbe the cheena thing is finalli seeping in..cant help but play dis *burp* song...
sigh...marketing is indeed powerful

Anyone care to translate?

Taking flooble out for a while...irritated coz cant scroll dwn...starting a new box..hope dis works..

Shuo Ai Ni by jolin

wo de shi jie bian de qi miao geng nan yi yan yu
huan yi wei shi cong tian er jiang de meng jing
zhi dao que ding shou de wen du lai zi ni xin li
zhe yi ke wo zhong yu yong gan shuo ai ni
yi kai shi wo zhi gu zhao kan ni
zhuang zuo bu jing yi xin que piao guo qu
huan qie xi ni mei fa xian wo duo zai jiao luo
mang zhao kuai le mang zhao gan dong
cong bi ci mo sheng dao shou hui shi wo men cong mei xiang guo
zhen ai dao xian zai bu gan qi dai

yao zheng ming zi ji ceng bei ni xiang qi Really?
wo hu si luan xiang jiu cong jin tian qi I wish
xiang yi ge xian jing que cong wei you yu xiang xin
ni zhen de yuan yi jiu qing gei wo jing xi

guan yu ai qing guo qu mei you yi xiang de jie ju
na tian qi que dian fu le zi ji luo ji
wo de huai yi suo you da an yin ni er ming bai
zhuan a zhuan jiu zhen de yu jian Mr.right

wo de shi jie bian de qi miao geng nan yi yan yu
huan yi wei shi cong tian er jiang de meng jing
zhi dao que ding shou de wen du lai zi ni xin li
zhe yi ke ye zhong yu yong gan shuo ai ni

Elise @ 7:19 PM | comment link here

Running Tots on a Lazy Sunday Afternn

Realise how vulnerable my two babes audz & mich r on their blogs....when i first started dis page, i wanted it to be a place where i take digs at myself and ppl i love...or 'hate' for that matter...
However, been realising some of my intimate feelins r seeping thru into the words on dis page...mebbe i haven been vulnerable for a long time and afraid of getting hurt...i dunno

Yez cell mtg after service, we brought up the issue of our cell not being close and elison not sure if she's mentoring us or not...sitting there listening as she shares her tots and feelins made me feel bad coz i was one of those who rejected her concern at times coz i was totalli shunning off other ppl...
WTF after shirley decided to leave...without even sparing a tot abt me....it still hurts...i still haven called her...not dat i hav not forigiven her...but i realli dunno wat i can say or share or tok to her abt now...
Insensitive and oblivious, i forgot my leader has feelins...made of flesh and blood...is an inidividual too...so after so long...those tears were aching to jerk out of my eyes...

I juz wanna say i am so sorry...for not seeing u as a person...for shutting u off w the rest....You r the ONLY person i ever realli allowed to speak into my life...ever since the day you asked me to stay for the retreat...ever since i met you after talking to RH during the encounter...ever since u were in the hostel rm crying along w me when my heart broke...ever since dat day of network mtg i couldnt bear it and hid....you found me...
No one had i ever went up to to voluntary share wats up w my life...without having to be asked....you were the first...
God has a plan for u and shld it be an open door somewhere else I sincerely wish u all the best...coz I know the BIg Guy is watching out for u all teh way...i juz pray dat watever hurts i've caused He'll heal...Thanks for being a leader who cares..shares...relates...directs...affirms...reprimands...open...honest...thank u


With slight puffy eyes *make dat HUGE puffs*, ventured out w jordan and the rest for number ball @ marina south. Back ard 2 plus...J shared abt some things in his life and i realli felt so silly being all wrapped up w my work and stuff when others may be facing life issues. Did i pray...manz..for him...after he left...

Guess i m so lost....need Him to give me a purpose and a direction....rite now there;s juz work work and more work...tho i m loving it....i knoe life needs to be more than dis...

"Show me Your ways
That I may walk with You
Show me Your ways
I put my hope in You

The cry of my heart is to ove You more
To live with the touch of Your hand
Stronger each day
Show me Your ways"

Show me Your ways - Russell Fragar



Elise @ 12:30 PM | comment link here

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nadir...loves Big Guy, dad-mum-sis-bro-granz, donkey, audz-ben-abby-shalom, mich, piper, sleepydog, yina, david, shue, mich c, smelly...

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