Saturday, August 22, 2009
It is timeSo I guess finally the time has come, a time that has been long overdue. It started when I stayed behind in NUS ministry after graduation and then staying on in the Youth net. It's official now that the whole load of us are moving on to where we are supposed to go - the Adults net.
I didn't realise I could feel so much when PS Sf met her gals who are supposed to move on last night. She shared her heart and every one of her words touched me deep within my soul. Her call was to run the race till the end and to constantly remember that God is in control ,and that He is forever faithful. The lyrics she read out were a promise that she will still be around as a spiritual guide and friend.
~
Find Your Wings - Mark Harris
It's only for a moment you are mine to hold
The plans that heaven has for you
Will all too soon unfold
So many different prayers I'll pray
For all that you might do
But most of all I'll want to know
You're walking in the truth
And if I never told you
I want you to know
As I watch you grow
I pray that God would fill your heart with dreams
And that faith gives you the courage
To dare to do great things
I'm here for you whatever this life brings
So let my love give you roots
And help you find your wings
May passion be the wind
That leads you through your days
And may conviction keep you strong
Guide you on your way
May there be many moments
That make your life so sweet
Oh, but more than memories
I pray that God will fill your heart with dreams
And that faith gives you the courage
To dare to do great things
I'm here for you whatever this life brings
So let my love give you roots
And help you find your wings
It's not living if you don't reach for the sky
I'll have tears as you take off
But I'll cheer as you fly
I pray that God would fill your heart with dreams
And that faith gives you the courage
To dare to do great things
I'm here for you whatever this life brings
So let my love give you roots
And help you find your wings
~
The crumbling moment came when she stooped low on her knees and started to wash our feet. Her words, in between the tricking cool water on my toes and the warm touch of the towel, were the very words that I have been longing to hear. That she felt happy for me and had one fewer person to worry about, that she approved of this relationship and that she blessed it...
Perhaps I have been seeking for some form of approval from people around me, for them to tell me "Hey this is the one for you" or "Yup, you are doing the right thing". But most important of all, it was God's way of using my spiritual leader to assure me - not that I did not know of it since K has been a God-sent through and through. It was just somewhat different, somewhat authenticated, somewhat distinct and clear.
Besides E, PS Sf would be the other person I really listen to and obey. Must be the times of weaknesses she has seen me through while holding on to the group. A rare few have seen me in such moments and she was definitely one pillar I had.
I have been touched and yes, I am blessed.
As I sat in the car, recalling the words she whispered to me, I could only thank Him for all that He has brought me through and all that He has given. And that is the reason why I held K's hand throughout the ride home.
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